Author: jae

excellent. my dad’s latest toy is a program that restores deleted image files. now it’s only a matter of time before the whole world knows what my real kinks are. (hint: it’s not dead, underage, hermaphroditic spider monkeys. exactly.)

well, my calves were way too burnt out today to muster anything more than .5 miles on the stupid damn manual treadmill. in .1 increments, no less. urgh!

BUT, i did do 250 situps! yay me! at first, my abs were too worn out, and i had to do 5, take a 10-20 second break, do another 5, etc. then i got up to ten, then fifteen, then twenty… i think i even did 25 without breaking at one point.

and, of course, the stretchy cords and the door-gym. man, that shit can get real heavy real quick! good thing i’m a hardcore muthafucka….

Jeb Bush is such a fucking asshole. i always said, after that stupid goddamn gun-totin’, rootin’ tootin’, maddog Shiner-drunk Texan, son-of-a-bitch (and bro-of-a-prick) depilitated albino gorilla bastard got into office, that i’d leave that fucked up trailer-park state, and i did. thank fucking god.

the Beatles issued their first single forty years ago today. thank god for that, too.

there’s little else in the world that is sadder than being stuck home alone on a chilly friday night and the only person on your Trillian buddy list (which is comprised of maybe a hundred different people on several different IM devices and accounts) is the one person you definitely don’t need to be around anymore; the one person who’s done the most emotional damage recently.

but i am as mighty as the ocean… tougher than the mountain… resilient as the earth itself. i am the cosmos.

what is your fondest wish?

so yesterday i set up the old manual (read: non-motorized!) treadmill, and let me tell you, that fuckin’ thang is like walking up a 60-degree slope! ok, ok, more like maybe ten. but still! right now i can only do about a quarter mile before my calves burn out (wtf?! the other day i walked NONSTOP for damn near 7 miles!). yesterday i did 1.25… today i’m working on doing at least 1.75 (to put me up to 3 miles total, so tomorrow i can do 2.0).

god damn, it’s hot in that greenhouse of a patio. i had to strip down to my boxers, because i don’t have shorts that aren’t either denim or too long.

right now i’m taking a break, because usually i’ll walk that bastard and then do assorted reps with the stretchy cord, and then go back to walking. that way, i alternate burning out my pistons.

(speaking of pistons…) when i exceeded my mileage from yesterday i celebrated heartily ]:)> send $1 & SASE for an “autographed” photo of the festivity.

also… -oh shut up, you know you like it ya lil’ freak!- …also, i dug out some more good CDs, just to take a break from Henry Rollins, although none of them are nearly as pumped-up or frenzied as Rollins Band. Ministry, Meat Beat Manifesto (did i mention i saw them on Hallowe’en in Prague?), and Frontline Assembly are my current faves. any suggestions for aggressive workout music would be greatly appreciated.

get ready to vote.

here are just a few sites to get you started on using your new-found super-power (or even help you acquire it). please be aware that the deadline for voter registration is nigh.

http://www.smartvoter.org/
http://www.vote-smart.org/index.phtml
excellent resources for issues and candidates

http://www.rockthevote.org/
some good info on proactive participation

Yahoo! directory: Voter Education and Awareness

remember: if you don’t actively participate in Democracy, then perhaps Democracy isn’t for you. there are many, many non-democratic countries out there that i’m sure would love to have you; just don’t expect to have any say in anything.

did 200+ situps today, but i’m not sure how much they really count for, since they were done with the “ab sculptor”, a knock-off of the ab-roller. it’s weird, it actually severely limits your range of motion, and makes it feel a lot harder. so you end up doing short little quicks bursts of up-down.

Chuck Taylor All-Stars + basketball = excellent
Chuck Taylor All-Stars + skateboarding = gnarly
Chuck Taylor All-Stars + long-distance walking = bad idea.

drinking and violent physical exertion don’t mix too well. especially when you have a 20-lb cast-iron dumbell thump you on the head. i don’t remember the actual moments just preceding… but it sure does hurt.

i feel sleepy. goodnight, world!

i have no idea why i never posted this before, when it was even relevant.

Carol King- “It’s Too Late”
(Tapestry, 1971?)

Stayed in bed all morning just to pass the time
There’s something wrong here
There can be no denying
One of us is changing
Or maybe we’ve just stopped trying

And it’s too late baby
Now it’s too late
Though we really did try to make it
Something inside has died
And I can’t hide
And I just can’t fake it
Wo no no no…

It used to be so easy living here with you
You were light and breezy
And I knew just what to do
Now you look so unhappy
And I feel like a fool

But it’s too late baby
Now it’s too late
Though we really did try to make it
Something inside has died
And I can’t hide
And I just can’t fake it

There’ll be a time just for me and you
But we just can’t stay together
Don’t you feel it too
Still I’m glad for what we had
And how I once loved you

And it’s too late baby
Now it’s too late
Though we really did try to make it
Something inside has died
And I can’t hide
And I just can’t fake it

Too late, baby, it’s too late
Darling, it’s too late

everybody who is not registered to vote, please do so now. get to your local DMV, public library, post office, polling centre, or wherever and MAKE IT SNAPPY!

i cannot stress enough the importance of this. we are at a crucial point in history where we must make firm choices that may in fact decide whether the human race is to advance any further, or not. even better than voting, get out there and DEMONSTRATE against the oppressive regime led by the powerdrunk madman called Bush. demonstrate against his illegal shoot-first tactics, against his fundamentalist “crusade” against non-christians, against his war-tyranny and overtly expressed desire to commit acts counter to the Geneva Convention and international law, against his putting politics before the sanctity of Life, against his efforts to turn America into a Human Rights-abusing police state, and, above all, demonstrate against his aggressive desire to rule the world!

MAKE A STAND, GOD DAMN YOU, OR WE’LL ALL SUFFER SOON ENOUGH!!

i wonder if it’s possible to overdose on (or become addicted to) topical painkillers (such as Ben-Gay, et al) …i can just see myself in ten years:
“yeah, i dip my cigarettes in the stuff.”

got some new ponytail elastics that don’t have the metal bands! what will they think of next? and to think, i almost cut my hair.

from Michael Moore‘s mailing list:

October 1, 2002
subj: “YOU ARE EITHER WITH US, OR YOU ARE FIRED!”

Dear Friends,

I was going to write you a letter about what a pathetic liar George W, Bush is — but then I figured, hey, why waste your time telling you something you already know!

You already know that his planned invasion of Iraq is a ruse meant to distract the public from the real issues, those issues being the following:
1. The number of people unemployed since he “took” office has risen by 35%.
2. We had a federal SURPLUS of $281 billion when he was inaugurated; today we have a DEFICIT of $157 billion.
3. TWO MILLION jobs have been eliminated since Bush began his occupation of the Oval Office.
4. The stock market is down 34% since January of 2001.
5. Another 1.4 million people now have NO health insurance, making it a total of over 41 million Americans who can’t afford to get sick.
6. Only 13 corporate crooks out of HUNDREDS have been indicted, and none of them have been the close personal friends of Mr. Bush.

THOSE are the real issues facing us, not some phony excuse for a war.

But, like I said, you already know that. You know that Bush is lying through his smirk when he says Iraq has “weapons of mass destruction.” He has not offered one shred of evidence to prove this. Not one! You know he is lying when he says that there is a “connection” between Saddam and bin Laden. Even members of his own administration have admitted that is not
true. It’s just one lie after another, and I applaud those three congressmen who went to Iraq this week and told it like it is — and demanded that the sanctions which have already killed a half-million Iraqi children be ended. Sen. Trent Lott said “they should come home and keep their mouths shut.” I say, we need more damn Democrats with that kind of courage and with mouths like that!

Which brings me to the real point of this letter. The Democrats.

I have never seen a more lame bunch of cowards and appeasers in my life. They are ready to bow down before Bush and give him what he wants to wage war against Iraq. This pathetic excuse of a party is an embarrassment to us all. The fact that they let Robert Torricelli run for re-election in New Jersey, knowing how dirty he was, shows just how capable they are of
handing the Senate over to Bush and the Republicans come November. They have blown it over and over again, and lots of good people I know who keep putting their faith in the Democrats are just giving up — and that is the worst thing to happen in a free society.

What are we going to do? Left to their own devices, the Democrats will not only hand both the House and the Senate to the Republicans in November, they will guarantee that Bush gets his second undeserved term in 2004. We must not let that happen. This year’s election was theirs for the taking. Just look at the state of the union Bush gave us: Bush cronies caught stealing from the corporate till, Bush and Cheney caught breaking the law in the ’90s, the economy in the toilet, and Bush failing to do the only real job he had to do since 9/11: Get bin Laden! What a disgrace! Yet the Democrats could not even find enough candidates to offer a REAL challenge
to the Republicans in nearly 200 House districts for the November 5th elections. What an appalling excuse of a party.

OK, I know, there is not much we can do about this now. But we all need to get busy and ensure that this whole rotten system is rocked by the disgruntled millions come election day 2004. Otherwise, we have no right to complain.

In the meantime, we must stop the Bush attack on Iraq. We must find out now, as W says, “who is wid us and who is agin us.” I am asking each of you to please sign the petition I have posted here (http://www.michaelmoore.com/petitions/peacepledge/index.php) and on my website (www.michaelmoore.com) informing the Democrats that whoever amongst them votes for this war, we pledge NEVER to vote for them again. I will personally see that your on-line signatures are delivered to every member
of Congress. I guarantee your voice will be heard loud and clear.

Go to http://www.michaelmoore.com/petitions/peacepledge/index.php and sign the petition to the Democrats: “You’re Either With Us Or You’re Fired.” Then let’s figure out together what we can do to turn things around by 2004.

Thanks for taking the time to do this. We have no other choice.

Yours,
Michael Moore

Iraq has just agreed with the U.N. to allow weapons inspectors in. the downside? surprise inspections were not even discussed. (source: MSNBC)

…and Republicans want to run unopposed in N.J., thanks to Torricelli’s dropping out late. fuckers. ALL YOU REPUBLICANS OUT THERE CAN KISS MY GREEN ASS.

and i still haven’t registered to vote!! shitfire, i gotta do that NOW.

crimony! i slept twelve hours last night. or damn near. i dunno, maybe it was ten. i’m not real sore from last night, but i’m all blisters.

i don’t know how i got to be so complacent in recent years. i used to push myself to the limits all the time- my mind, my consciousness, my body… well, not as much my body, but i used to be the fastest motherfucker in the universe when i was a kid. a regular Speedy Gonzales, although most people wouldn’t know what even means, since he’s been banned from TeeVee for being an entertaining Mexican hero and victor who just so happens to fit a certain “type”. anyways, whenever i’d race some hotshot for the first time, i always used to thrill to the sound of them stopping dead in their tracks behind me, muttering “what the fuck?” as i tore through the wind like a mad bolt of lightning. let me tell you, i was fast. asthma and smoking tried to kill it, but i still got some fire left.

i’m mobile!

god damn! somebody tell that ridiculous beer-crazed, coke-addled, gun-waving, mad Texan to sit the fuck down and shut up!!

thank god for Tom Daschle and his ilk.

jayzuss!

i’m not even gonna bother giving all the reasons why we shouldn’t even be thinking of going to war with Iraq, because we’ve all heard them over and over and over. so why isn’t anybody listening? christ, the whole thing just makes me sick to my stomache.

http://www.signupforpeace.com/petition.asp

in other news, Charles Henri Ford, author of the so-called “first” gay novel (The Young and the Evil, i believe, from i think about 1933), has passed away.

wow, i just got back from walking all around the perimeter of my hometown, nonstop. non.stop. so, lessee… Nuke Our Lyle, OH, pop. approximately 6,000, and maybe five miles circumference, although i swear it seemed more like ten since i had ten pound weights on each of my wrists and ankles. did a lot of thinkin & philosophizin & theorizin and stuff, but i’m too tired to put it all down here now, so goodnight, world.

the reason, i think, that i just can’t be actively bisexual is that, god damn it, i just fucking love pussy. mmm mmm mmm. i love the sounds i hear when i am going down on someone special. + i love the way it feels, especially when it’s all nice and wet.

i think it may be my favouritest thing in the universe, next to the universe itself.

speaking of wet pussy: i got a review today on garageband.com for my song “sci-fu”. it went like this:

1-sweet change ups, excellent sound production. 2-sinister yet sweet, kind of like good video game music 3-jungle but not boring as far as drums; the melody was even sweeter; the piano-ish sound made me wet

bing!

right now i am wearing 10 pound weights on my wrists and ankles. it almost feels bondage-sexy. too bad i can still move, and worse that nobody is here right now to force me to do things that would make the Marquis de Sade blush.

what is your greatest fear?