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current events internets media

link roundup

The universe just gained a lot of weight: Neutrinos evidently have mass after all.

Speaking of fat: Homer now has to have a bigger screen.

Prayer probably powerless. Having heart surgery? Prayer won’t help you. Looks like regular exercise and a healthier diet is all that can save us now.

“Only three things are certain in life. MySpace, Taxes, and Death.”

Coolest. Case mod. Evar.

Tim Berners-Lee (inventor of the World Wide Web) on The Future of the Web (w/ mp3).

From the WTF!? files: Flying Spaghetti Monster (anti-ID spoof) on Al-Jazeera. Do not adjust your set; you read that correctly.

“Respectfully missing” David Byrne/Brian Eno …Bush of Ghosts track “Qu’ran” turns up as mp3 on blogs.

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uncategorized

update on work

my fuckwit boss pulled me into her office today, after explaining to the whole crew how we can no longer be off the phones without express supervisor permission (thanks, i’m well aware, to yours truly). she told me that i was permanently off of the online resource guides project.

so, yeah, thanks and all that, y’know, whatever, but Erica just got a program to make a thing, so now it’ll be a lot better.

how’s that for tact?

i have lost all pride, faith, and confidence in my employers, just as they suddenly, without warning, and (most hurtfully) arbitrarily have with me. in short, LTD can kiss my ass.

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uncategorized

life in corporate hell

Wanna know why i want to quit my job?

Today i got a major talkin’-to at work from my boss’s boss, with my [fuckwit] boss and another boss in the room, looking like rotten teenagers who got ratted out by some wet-assed freshman; neither of them had anything to say because they knew that it was not my fault that i had almost no guidelines for a project i worked hard on and was now being grilled about.

It was all about the intranet site i built for them (99% from scratch, using only pre-made text).

  • Who am i communicating with?
  • Who have i been answering to?
  • Who’s been giving me the orders?
  • What kind of guidelines were given within which i was to operate?
  • What kind of a time frame was it to be done within?
  • Was there any talk about getting supervisor permission every time i opened a file or stroked a friggin’ key?

But the most important topic they really want to know is:

  • Who’s paying for this time you’ve been paid for, when you weren’t doing your [normal] job?

The Bottom Line here is that they’re $140,000 in the hole because they were too greedy to make holiday money to bother developing their own business, and instead chose these torrential downfucks to do their job for them. And they did it badly. Which meant that

  • That many packages arrived poorly packed and their contents broken, damaged, missing, or worse;
  • That the systems they gave us to use barely functioned within the scope that we needed them to and insured that critical mistakes could not be corrected;
  • That when their crappy website fucked up we had to wait in line for hours and sometimes much, much longer just to get really critically bad things (such as prices that were off by as much as $150/$4) fixed;
  • That we had no control over any Real aspect of the business besides literally handing out free product left and right;
  • That they lost half of their call center workforce over the fiasco;
  • And that they had to give out appeasement money hand over fist to rightly angry customers just so they could retain their popular and swanky reputation.

It was a piss-poor business decision, and it has almost run the entire brand out of business. If it weren’t for the massive amount of money they did manage to make, they’d have been in the hole for a hell of a lot more money than $140k! Fortunately, they only have 4.5 years to go on their contract.

But i digress.

For this project i hand-coded about 3MB of code from scrath into Notepad (and in several cases, made neat, usable graphics using MS Paint, often better than some of the ones i had to work with). There are literally hundreds of products that our people now have better resources for. And towards the end, when they couldn’t get their heads out of their asses to flip the dreaded, and apparently difficult to operate, Folder Permissions Switch so that temps and new hires could see the thing running of the S:\ drive, i made another one for the P:\ drive. (Actually, i only copied it within minutes, and because i’m good at what i do and work smart, i didn’t have to change a single URI.)

The business structure of the online manual project was never formalized in any way.

A more cynical and pessimistic person might theorize that if enough people deny accountability for the online Quick Reference and Product Resource guides that i volunteered to do (and at least twice asked if i could just do the goddamn thing at home), then they could have a fraud case against me.

To wit: I used several dozen man-hours, at the foaming-at-the-mouth insane price of $10.70 an hour, to develop this thing, when it could easily have been done in just a few dozen man-hours if done by a team of Actual Professionals (which they evidently don’t realize charge a whole fucking hell of a lot more than i cost them). Which, i should mention, looks fucking sweet, functions exactly as it should, includes tons of useful content, and, ahem, validates (well, except for one little CSS hack).

Given the overwhelming amount of Real Work i had to do, i was often extremely limited in the time i could spend on it. During peak season (November through February in this case), i barely touched it, or didn’t touch it at all. When we slowed down, i was all over it. And that’s really only been in the last couple weeks. I’d say all in all i spent an average of maybe 30-90 minutes a week on the thing, which is why it was launched (before complete) about 4 months after i had first proposed it, and only got “finished” (more or less) this week.

It was not, i must point out, done from a bully-pulpit. I got talked-to in an even and pretty fair way. And although i am a bitterly cynical and pessimistic man (don’t knock it – surprises are always better this way), i’m actually quite positive – at this stage – that All They Want is to figure out which brand and department has to foot the bill for a fraction of my paycheck.

I forwarded every bit of e-mail i sent or received regarding the thing to my boss’s boss. He’s bound to see not only how unprofessional and unbusinesslike my writing is, but also that i have no culpability in the whole affair, and in fact often volunteered to Work For Free.

In any case, i am scouring Monster again.

Anybody know of any local businesses needing a non-fuckwit?

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uncategorized

Klan follies

i hope that’s not really our own Jim Gay. It’s not very nice to say things like that, warranted or not.

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uncategorized

remix this!

My Life in the Bush of Ghosts (news) (official site)

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CDs creative internets uncategorized

My Life in the Bush of Ghosts

The classic David Byrne(rss)/Brian Eno(fansite) album has been remastered, and will soon have 2 songs’ entire multitrack content available for remixing under the Creative Commons license.

More info available on the album’s official site, which also includes a rare video for the song “Mea Culpa”.

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uncategorized

cha-ch-ch-ch-changes; or, Fuck Life

my grandpa is always asleep when i call over there. i haven’t even been over in a couple of weeks now. it’s just too goddamned depressing; i can’t bear it at all.

oddly, i’m not drinking it away. just sleeping.

cha-ch-ch-ch-changesFUCK OFF.

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uncategorized

bizarre dream

Cat Stevens video for what feels like that Sam Cooke song he covered (“Another Saturday Night”), but the song itself having more “Peace Train” to it:

Guy who is not Sam Cooke but for some odd reason supposed to be Otis Redding, who actually looks a whole lot more along the lines of a slightly beefier, more serious 70’s Richard Pryor, squarer jaw maybe?, with moustache and mid-height afro, brown suit, white or yellow or cream shirt, making out with duplicate self. Video fades to black as song is beginning final verse. Awkward on so many levels.

Somebody, maybe one of you crazy dream-interpretation New Ager weirdos, tell me something about THAT one, huh? ‘The fuck is that supposed to mean?!

Categories
current events media

Long Live The 9/11 Conspiracy!

Holy crap… link posted via Beca, another Livejournal friend, Long Live The 9/11 Conspiracy!, by Mark Morford. An amazing read… especially if you’re feeling a bit paranoid.

Also a must-read: this general 9/11 conspiracy theory rebuttal from Popular Mechanics. Thanks to yet another LJ friend, nostradomnatrix, for the link.

Categories
CDs current events friends

video: Cocker Spaniel rocks out to ex-GBV Bob Pollard @ SXSW 2006

My LiveJournal friend Sean Padilla, of masterful freakpop one-man band The Cocker Spaniels, rocks out (in front) to former Guided By Voices frontman Robert Pollard‘s set at SXSW.

Sean seriously fucking rocks. Get The Cocker Spaniel’s latest CD you fools.

Categories
current events

Napoli’d!!!

An example of an acceptable reason for abortion, by frothing-at-the-mouth South Dakota Senator (R) Bill Napoli:

BILL NAPOLI: A real-life description to me would be a rape victim, brutally raped, savaged. The girl was a virgin. She was religious. She planned on saving her virginity until she was married. She was brutalized and raped, sodomized as bad as you can possibly make it, and is impregnated. I mean, that girl could be so messed up, physically and psychologically, that carrying that child could very well threaten her life.

…does this strike anyone else as a little too much rumination on the topic? Bill Napoli is starting to scare me almost as much as Bill Frist already does.

Beware of Napoliage

Rampway Online – Napoli’d!!!

Bill Napoli Is All Twisted Up and Dead Inside

The infamous Napoli cartoon, by Stephanie McMillan

Bid on the original cartoon by Stephanie McMillan (ends 5 April 2006)

Categories
current events internets

Drop Shadows Not Bombs

Go to PLAYGROUND OF THE STARS to get your nerdy “Drop Shadows Not Bombs” T-shirt. Way cool, man.

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uncategorized

headache

i left work early tonight (completely unrelated to my little rant from yesterday). my head hurts so badly.

is it common for headaches to usually be focused on the same area of the head?

and can somebody e-mail me some Orudis KT? please? i’ll totally pay you back.

Categories
life work

head ache

Today i went home early for the first time in so long that i forgot how to even do it. Literally. My head hurts. It feels like it’s filling up with hard foam rubber or something. Every time i get a headache, it seems like the focus is always in the same place, just to the right and a little in front of the crown. I’m not sure if that’s common, but if it keeps up i’m going to go and tell on it.

O god how i wish someone could Paypal me some Orudis KT right now.

Categories
creative internets work

work rant/new directions ahead

From the desk of the Customer Service Adventures department:

I have to admit, i am of late feeling somewhat slighted at work. I just designed and built an entire intranet for my work, from scratch, all during a few hours here and there when i was “allowed” to do so. It’s comprehensive, it’s modern and standards-compliant, it looks clean and nice, with some tasty flourishes via CSS, and it took a lot of blood, sweat, and tears to make it happen – all by myself. I even had to make do with MS Paint to do some little extra graphics, and the entire f-ing thing was hand-coded in Notepad.

Instead of getting recognized, i got a couple of “hey, that’s really nices” and a lot of flack – for, of all things, taking too much time. Mind you, i created something like 100 pages filled with useful technical and product information in Notepad. I was expected to do it with just a few hours here and there. All in all, i’d say i probably only put about 50-60 hours into the entire thing, from start to finish – and it actually looks really nice and functions exactly as it’s supposed to function. There’s probably something like 3 or 4 MB of hand-coded XHTML and CSS, with just a touch of JavaScript (just to correct an Internet Explorer CSS :hover issue).

I even offered to do it on my own time, out of loyalty to my company, and just because i could have gotten it done about 3 months ago if i had. Yes, it’s taken since late November/early December, because i could only work on it when we had less than 1000 e-mails in our queue, which was extremely rare during and after the holiday season (it’s an online retailer) (actually, we never did have less than 1k during that time – i had to wait until late January/early February to dig it all back up). It’s not really even done now – i really want to go back and update all the old information they already had that i fixed and converted to the new format for them.

I’ve also explained numerous times that if i could just do it in PHP, preferably using a database such as MySQL (both of which are free and secure), i could do it in far less time, as i could set up one template that could handle pretty much all functionality and markup, and just dynamically inject content into it via the links the users click to request information. But no. That would be too much hassle for the IT department to set up (nevermind that i could do the damn thing myself).

And now, instead of a note of thanks or a pat on the back, neither of which i’ve even hinted at requesting, natch, they’re sitting me down and patiently explaining that i need to work less on it, because of budget reasons. No, i’m not getting paid a cent extra – it’s just that i’m no longer working for Brand Y, who pays for it, but am taking Brand X’s time. They bully me and make me feel like somehow, all of the hard work and dedication i’ve put into my work notwithstanding, i’m lazy for doing all that i have done. (Naturally, i won’t be getting a copy of my hard work for my portfolio, even though there’s nothing even remotely top-secret on it.)

Bullshit, honestly.

So I am now officially keeping my eye open for other positions in the area. I need more challenge, and to feel like i’m making an honest difference. My girlfriend will be out of school in a year’s time, and then we can do anything we want to do. Most likely, the Dot Com sector will be more stable and robust by then anyway. I admit i lack schooling, but i lack little else, especially determination, perseverance, and dedication.

Categories
current events

word of the day: kleptocrat

The re-elected Belarus neo-Stalinist Alexander Lukashenko is a phony and a fraud. This video purports to show how votes were deliberately, physically fouled in his favor.

“The whole world is watching.”

Categories
internets music

new site for studio rats and home recordists

wikiRecording looks very promising, indeed! Yay Interweb!

Categories
internets

IE7

According to MezzoBlue’s Dave Shea IE7 is really, honestly going to fix (almost) all of those things we’ve been whining and complaining about for, well, years now. Some of the mouth-wateringly acceptable features IE7 will now finally be capable of, out of the box: PNG’s alpha-channel transparency (thank fucking god), fixed positioning, and the :hover pseudo-class now works on (supposedly) any element!

IE7 beta is available, and the rendering engine is, basically, as finished as it’s likely to get; any changes from this point out will have to do more with bug fixes and security. I’m going to download it and see it for myself.

And if you do not upgrade on the day it is released, you’re a monkey’s arse and i will – mark my words – no longer be making web sites with your lousy browser experience in mind.

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uncategorized

i am a nasty, selfish little ass-face (and i love you)

or: A Confession, an Admission of Wickedness; Wherein a Misdeed Moste Terrible is More or Less Put Right, Albeit Rather Belatedly, But at Leaste With Some Smalle Amounte of Flayre

*sigh*

here goes…

Mom… Dad… i’ve been taking Marijuana

i haven’t read anybody else’s LJ (except for a very few close friends, and a far fewer far friends/idols/feeds) in probably over a year now.

in fact, although i have 55 total friends, watch over 200 communities, and have 44 syndicated feeds, i have been tightly filtering my friends page down to something like 40-50 total sources. that means that some of you, i sincerely regret, have been, in the past, to put it, well, bluntly, but at least, somewhat, buffered by several commas, cut out.

and i hate that, because i love all of you kooky freaks. and i miss those of you who i haven’t been reading lately.

well, mainly it had a lot (read: everything) to do with the fact that i didn’t have a computer and thus had limited online time available to play catch-up. i now have a computer, don’t i? what have i been waiting for?

i feel like such a bad friend. i have been a bad friend. one who deserves a spanking.

it occurred to me recently that i have only been hanging on to LJ for the community. not the communities. the community. i have my new dumb little blog, and i do enjoy posting there. in fact, i have posted there more than anywhere else of late. it’s mine, and i’m proud of it. i can do literally anything i want there. i don’t have to learn some esoteric new meta-markup just to make it look pretty (which it doesn’t anyway, but i digress). the air is nice, and the view of the internet is breathtaking. it’s nice to move from a coliseum to the open air of a field. it is! but while my sound may, at least in theory, travel much farther, the sound back from those i look upon is considerably muted by distance (and, truthfully, lack of participants).

so while i may post there more often, please be assured that i am reading every wonderful little word that you are writing. except for those which you have selfishly locked away from my prying eyes. (yes, i am no longer hacking into your account. and i’m very sorry about that.)

also, while i’m not keen on pointing out who exactly i’ve wronged (as i’m additionally not keen on pointing out my own shame and guilt and myriad of iniquities), i do wish to make it clear that although i may well not have commented in a long, long time, i have definitely been reading more of you folks than you might think, anyway.

my new must-read filter will now contain only those communities and feeds that i am fond of, but also every single human being who is currently a mutual friend.

the floodgates are now open. completely, and fully. welcome back, my darling little kittens. i have missed you so.

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uncategorized

say hell yes

you should all go run out right this very minute, and see V for Vendetta.

also, buy the new Prince album. it is seriously funky and very, very good. you be screamin’ like a white lady when he counts to 3.