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Yesterday we threw my grandmother a birthday party. Her birthday’s the 20th. i just wanted her to have one last special day, and to help her have closure (us too, i guess). We’ve all said our bittersweet goodbyes at this point, including me.

Today her breathing was labored, and she was making a wheezing moaning with every breath. This went on intermittently all day long, until a few hours ago. Since then, we’ve had nurses and other professionals come out. She’s on oxygen. The unanimous concensus is that she may well pass away tonight. i will be on vigil round the clock over her until she does. God, she’s so brave and so strong.

i love my grandma. i really love my grandma. She raised me. i’m going back into her room after a cigarette and a cry; otherwise, i’d tell you exactly how wonderful she is. For now, you’ll just have to trust me on this.

By jae

jae lethe (he/she/they) is a blogger, musician, artist, poet, web developer/designer, armchair philosophizer, teller of tales, and gadabout. Also, something he calls a "behavioral artist." (Not sure.) She has plans. BIG plans.

Among the things that he has done for a laugh are minor fractures, cuts, scrapes, and various scabs. Though she's quick to point out that they're no imbecile, we're fairly certain that he thinks the word means some kind of medieval pharmacist.

This is her latest home on teh internets - where jae stores their swear words, when they're not hurling them at the sun in vain.