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so, tonight i take on the daunting task of restoring my database and upgrading my message board.

daunting, because my database name and password got changed, and i’m running like a million PHP applications from it (CONA memberlist (actually a modified guestbook), terrible society bbs, b2 blog, and something else i forgot), so i’ll have to manually reconfigure a whole slew of files. and with upgrading my board, it’ll be a bit of a pain in the ass.

and, let’s face it, i can’t code worth a shit. oh, i do alright with HTML and CSS (though i’m real sloppy and my code rarely, if ever, validates to even 75% – even taking into account that the w3c‘s code validator sucks ass), but this PHP/MySQL shit is too much for my poor little brain cell! all i can really do in PHP is set a few variables and call up includes. i can’t even write [much] JavaScript!

but hey, i’ve done okay, considering i only just taught myself all this crazy shit a little over 2 years ago. and i can always hack the holy livin’ hell outta the simple shit.

dammit, i’m just stalling. *si-i-igh*

i don’t even know where to begin.

let’s see…
first, run 01.19.03’s SQL locally, send to phpBB2.0.3
then, uh… okay, output SQL WITH drop tables and full inserts
then, ummm… alright, then i have to… uh… overwrite local copy of phpBB2.0.3 with phpBB2.0.4
wait… BACK UP FILES FIRST…
and then, run upgrade script
then, edit all config files with new db name/password
wait… should i wait and output SQL after i rename stuff? no, i’ll just edit it manually…
after that i should test fly phpBB2.0.4 to make sure i have no problems locally
then, upload edited (new db name/pw) NEW SQL to remote host
make sure i BACKUP FILES!!
run upgrade from phpBB2.0.3 to 2.0.4
make sure everything works okay
then, edit every single config file for new db name/pw
after that, test every gadget i’m running for buggies
then, bang my head when nothing works right
then, spend about 3 hours debugging everything remotely
more testing… again…
then, masturbate (if necessary)
finally, finish my beer and go to sleep

(EDIT: output final full SQL AFTER upgrading board because of stupid lousy minor db structure changes)

jesus, i hope i can remember all that, IN ORDER.

wish me luck!

By jae

jae lethe (he/she/they) is a blogger, musician, artist, poet, web developer/designer, armchair philosophizer, teller of tales, and gadabout. Also, something he calls a "behavioral artist." (Not sure.) She has plans. BIG plans.

Among the things that he has done for a laugh are minor fractures, cuts, scrapes, and various scabs. Though she's quick to point out that they're no imbecile, we're fairly certain that he thinks the word means some kind of medieval pharmacist.

This is her latest home on teh internets - where jae stores their swear words, when they're not hurling them at the sun in vain.