the players:
mushy, sentimental me (the Positivist)
bitter, cynical me (the Negativist)
hardassed me (the Rationalist)
MSM: go for it. hey, ya never know!
BCM: don’t. it’ll end, as they say, in tears.
HM: fuck it. it’s your call, dude. either play her like she’s playing you… why can’t you also eat your cake? …or drop it. she doesn’t deserve you anyway. everybody knows that.
MSM and BCM: oh, that’s just crass! “play her”? get out of here with that phony horseshit!
HM: okay, okay! you’re right, that would be too much. but if you want to go along with her little game, just leave your emotions out of it. get what you want; as much of it as you can grab. and give as little as possible in return.
BCM: oh, don’t be so nasty. and yet it’s not even worth that! it’s not that easy to just step in and step out like that. sooner or later somebody has to get jacked. best not be you. get out while you still can! while you still have control of your own will, for god’s sake!
MSM: but she’s wonderful! absolutely amazing *sigh*
BCM: …and she doesn’t love you. she’s said, in so many words, that she probably never will, too. soooo… what’s the point? you don’t live for sex alone, do you? don’t you want -dare i say need– to feel fulfilled?
HM: ha ha ha ha ha! that’s a good one, that is! look, you feel good now and you’re going to feel bad later. that’s how it ALWAYS works. you know that. don’t you? so just do what you fucking well want and quit whining about it. your life is about YOU, not anyone else.
MSM: and yet there must always be hope…
BCM & HM: hurm?
MSM: i mean, if it wasn’t for that one stupid, tiny little philosophical difference, you’d be a perfect match. and you know it. all of you do!
BCM: that doesn’t mean it won’t end in disaster and despair… look, just trust me on this one: don’t set yourself up for failure. GOD! you always do this! just listen!
HM: that’s what i’m saying. either drop her, or… or… look, just go ahead and have your fun! what the hell! it can’t hurt you if you don’t LET it!
MSM: god, that’s still a bit cold, isn’t it? i mean, she’s a real sweetheart… you just don’t see that–
HM: see what? i see someone who only wants to have a little fun! and what’s wrong with that? but then again… how many lovers will it take before she is satisfied? and by then, what?! what are you then? you’ll be nothing to her. nothing. my suggestion stands. play or get out.
MSM: oh, fuck off, the two of ya. you have no idea. sooner or later, we’re gonna have RANK!
BCM: and that’s good for…?
MSM: well, if she ever decides she wants to focus on one companion, you’ll be at the front of the line! but you’ve gotta stick it out, as long as it takes! trust me, THIS one’s totally worth it… finally!
BCM: actually, you may be right.
MSM: hullo-oo! thank yew!
BCM: but if you’re not, then you’ll be tragically mistaken. what do you think, everyone has the same methods and ideals? of course not, you misbegotten pinhead! some people simply find they have no need for limitations or ownership. jesus! everybody’s got a different perspective; even you know that!
MSM: no, i’m not saying… hey, who did you call a… does that even make sense?
HM: theoretically, it checks out. more or less. but i’d say it’s poor usage anyhow.
BCM: anyway.
HM: whatever!
BCM: in any case, these are very very fundamental differences. we two are not compatible. therefore, we should not even bother trying to stick our square pegs–
HM: please don’t go any farther with that, will you?
MSM: i’m feeling dizzy.
HM: oh, shut up, you hare-brained sissy!
BCM: so what are we to do, then?
HM: i already told you.
BCM & MSM: right!
MSM: you’ve said nothing! only that you suggest either going with it, or not. what kind of suggestion is that?
HM: did you read my bits at all?
MSM: so what! look, this girl is everything we need, everything we so desperately crave… we’ve got to–
BCM: avoid her. she’s everything we need should we happen to need a hole in the left arterial valve. gaping one at that. you know how hard you’ve fallen! want to make it worse?
HM: exactly! just leave your stupid faltering bleeding heart out of it. loosen up; have a little fun.
MSM: hey, wait a minute! you lot weren’t even there!
HM & BCM: …so?
MSM: so how could even know anything at all? you didn’t see the sparkle in her eyes. you didn’t feel the tenderness of her caresses. i tell you, she can make *everything* right as rain! she’s The One!
BCM: okay, Morpheus. and where does rain end up, then?
HM: the gutter, i believe.
BCM: right, right. so let’s go over this again…
MSM: oh, fuck off. you two have no idea. you’ve lost your own abilities to love, and here you are complaining about others!
HM: ok, i can see that. so what’s your point?
MSM: my point is simply this: when it’s on, it’s really ON. and when it’s not, well… nobody can actually expect to have a 100% ON relationship, can they?!
HM: and since when did you start having rational ideas?
MSM: bugger off.
HM: no, i agree with you!
MSM: you… you do?
HM: of course! that’s why i’m saying this sort of thing should not be pursued with the intention of falsifying some sort of weird, twisted “love”! it’s never going to be fully right like that anyhow. take a step back and you’ll see what i mean. it’ll just make it harder on everybody involved.
BCM: yikes! that could be a lot of people. potentially, that is.
MSM: neither of you jackoffs are listening to me.
BCM: well, we agree on one thing, then!
HM: hear, hear!
bickering continues ad nauseum. |
