i feel
something crappy happened the other day, and i don’t know what it was, but i know it will affect me for a while nonetheless.
damn. i’m such a horrible person. i can’t keep friends. no wonder i don’t have any friends IRL. no wonder nobody ever calls. i act like an asshole too much.
i wasn’t the only one with a shitty attitude, though.
but i shouldn’t lash out when i get my stupid feelings hurt. when did i stop bottling things up? i used to keep everything under my shirt. now i hack and slash and burn my way through what little that still stands of my social life.
jesus christ. i have nobody close to me anymore. i’ve run them all off.
some of them SHOULDA been run off. some of them just make me uncomfortable. come to think of it, there’s gonna be a wedding tomorrow that i coulda ruined if i hadn’t done certain things badly.
which makes me think: obviously most things are better off without me.
i’m such an extremist. i have so much love and compassion, and so much bitterness and hatred. i’m a walking fuckin’ Tao on a thai stick.
laugh at the whiny loser. go ahead, i can’t hear you.
